Separation Anxiety

Upon returning home, I was very happy to see that both Eric and Noah had survived my time away. But the time away was hard on all of us. Eric can say with certainty that he never wants to be a single-dad. I learned that two weeks away is much too long from my favorite two guys. And Noah, though he did okay while I was away, now has significant separation anxiety (particularly at night).

The last two nights have been difficult putting Noah to bed. We've gone through the regular routine both nights. I read him bedtime stories, he sucked down a glass of milk and I rocked him to sleep. Usually once he's asleep I can gently lay him in his bed and sneak out of his room. But not the last two nights.

The last two nights as soon as I make any movement toward his crib he wakes and grabs onto me like he's sure I'm going to leave him again. I rock him back to sleep, hold him a little longer until I'm sure he's in a deep sleep, then try again to put him in bed. As soon as his body touches the mattress his eyes pop open. I try to rub his back and shhhh him back to sleep, but with no success. He immediately stands up in his crib with his arms stretched over his head high and says "momma momma momma". It's heartbreaking. I know he thinks that if he closes his eyes and drifts off to sleep, he might wake up and I'll be gone again.

Don't worry Noah, I'm not going anywhere. I'm here and it's okay to go back to sleep.

My Mommy's In the Computer

I recently had to make an almost two week business trip to Malaysia and China. I was very worried about being away from the guys for so long, so I did everything I could to make it easier on them. I spent a Saturday preparing meals at Let's Dish so Eric just needed to pop something in the oven or heat a meal on the stove. I also made sure a bunch of our friends and family knew I would be away so Eric and Noah wouldn't have to be home alone every night. I knew my two guys would be fine, but I still wanted to make it as easy as possible on them. The one thing I knew I couldn't do was be here and I knew that would be hard on all of us... It was hard on all of us, but it was hardest on Noah.

We devised a plan to video conference while I was away. We used Google to video chat through our Gmail accounts. It worked wonderfully. I was able to connect with Noah and Eric several times during my journey in Malaysia and China. Unfortunately, the 13-hour time difference and a few technical difficulties made it difficult to chat for more than 15 minutes each day. Video chatting was a life saver. I don't know how I could have survived two weeks away from my 19-month-old without it. Since Noah doesn't yet understand telephones, chatting on the phone just wasn't going to be good enough. But with video chatting, I was able to see Noah and wave to him and talk to him about his day. Noah returned my smiles and waved saying "Hi Momma. Hi Momma."

Fortunately, we all survived my time away. The only unfortunate thing about connecting via video chat was that Noah began to think I was 'IN' the computer. Every morning he would go upstairs to the computer and say "Hi Momma." Unfortunately, I wasn't always there to return his hello.

It's good to be home and 'OUT' of the computer.